As a person, as a parent, there is nothing worse than being lied to. It’s magnified even more when it’s your own child who’s doing the lying. And to add insult to injury, it pisses me off even more when my 11 year old child tries to pull a fast one on me. There’s a mantra in my house, “Don’t try to out think me, you can’t! “ However, it never fails as girl wonder always tries to do it……
So, advances in technology have made it harder and harder for kids to get away with things at school like they used to. Back when I was in middle school, if something happened, they would call home, work, or wherever to get in touch with your parents. There were SO many ways around that and I’m sure many of you will know what I’m talking about. My mama didn’t know I had an “F” until grades came out. She didn’t know I skipped school because I would forge all of my tardy/absent slips. The list goes on. Well, lil mama won’t get it through her double-wide head that EVERYTHING she does at school I find out about. When she’s tardy, I get an email. When she gets a grade less than 75, I get an email. If she gets bit by a one-legged, midget monkey, I get an email. Things are set to where I get an automated email or phone call if she takes a dump and it don’t smell right! She KNOWS this but still continues to bump her damn head against the wall.Alright, so let me paint the picture. In addition to getting email alerts about grades, I can log on and check daily grades, tests, homework, etc. Well, I’m perusing her grades and I come across a ZERO. I can halfway deal with a poor score but a “0” just means yo a** didn’t do the work. I don’t like that. Fast forward…….I ask about the zero and she says “Daddy, I turned it in but she forgot to put the grade in.” Really, dawg? Really?......What I heard was, “Daddy, I think you’re dumb as hell and I’m going to tell you this lame story in hopes that you believe it.” Well, I tell her to just have the teacher correct the grade and email me. Cool, right? Hell naw! The next day, she still has a zero and I ask about it. She proceeds to pull out a worksheet and says, “See Daddy, I did it, she just didn’t put the grade in the book.” Okay Grasshopper, “Why is there no date and or grade on the paper? Why isn’t this the same damn assignment that is marked as zero online?” The assignment was for Verbs and this sheet says NOUNS!……..It is Daddy, I don’t know why she put the wrong assignment in the computer. Okay Grasshopper….. So, I give her another chance to tell the truth and I tell her again, “if this is the story you’re sticking with, don’t come home with a ZERO.” Yep, she rolled with it and got out of the car.
…..I pick her up later and she proceeds to show me a completely different assignment that has a checkmark on it. Yes, different than what was assigned AND different than the fake a** worksheet she previously showed me. To add insult to injury, at the bottom it clearly says “Too Late, No Credit”. Again, why is she trying to out think me? At no point did she say, damn, I showed this dude something TOTALLY different yesterday but I’ll give him this one in hopes he’s just that damn dumb and won’t trip or man, I told this dude I turned it in 2 WEEKS ago but really I tried to turn in in today. Nope! So…..she’s just going to piss on my head and call it rain? Really?Cut scene………….
There is a lot more to this story but it would take too much time and effort to type. I wasn’t that pissed about the zero, I would have let it ride, to a degree. What pissed me off is the idea that you think your father is that dumb that you can show him an apple and call it an orange the next day. Really? What pissed me off is I gave her numerous chances to tell the truth and she wouldn’t. I told her where she was lying, how she was lying, and she still stuck to it. I gave her the key to the door but this fool still tried to climb out the window. Really? Done.
